Who Would You Take To War?

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Trust is one of the most important ingredients in any relationship. In leadership is means the difference between compliance and heartfelt commitment.

 

Last week, I was discussing with a client memorable moments in her career. She told me that a past leader had once said something to her that she’s never forgotten. It was this:

‘I’d take you to war with me’

Wow. Love that! As you might have guessed, he had a military background and this statement to my client meant something very special. It meant that he trusted her. He was saying:

I trust you. I believe in you. I can count on you. I know you have my back.

Trust is one of the most important ingredients in any relationship. As a leader, without trust, you merely get compliance from your people, never heartfelt commitment. They’ll say one thing to your face because you’re the boss but say something different behind your back, or at least be thinking it. They’ll cruise at work, stay under the radar and do what’s expected of them but they’ll never go above and beyond.

Let’s face it, at times the corporate environment can feel like a battle field; office politics and alliances, people scrambling for power, position plays, constant change and uncertainty and hyper competition. People can feel like they are in the trenches day in day out. What they need is a leader who they can trust; a leader who they can believe in.

In this busy corporate world, I don’t know about you, but I don’t have the time or the energy to second guess my own people. The people who are supposedly on my own team. I don’t want to have to micromanage them. I don’t want to have to check if what they’ve told me is true or not. What a waste! I want to trust my people and for them to trust me in return. Only then, can we can get on with doing the job, delivering to our clients, being creative and innovative and having some fun along the way!

So tell me, how are you building trust each day with your people and who would you take to war with you?

 

 

Midja x

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Learning To Lead By Giving Up Control

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Giving up control as a leader can be tough. I learnt this week that I prefer to have my hands on the steering wheel at all times.

It’s been a momentous week in the Fisher household. My eldest son, Tommy, got his learners licence. He passed the online test on Wednesday night and then on Thursday, his 16th birthday, I picked him up from school at lunch time and he collected his license at the Department of Transport. He was behind the steering wheel by 1 o’clock. And it was the most terrifying experience of my life!

I so wanted to be that cool and calm parent, being encouraging and supportive but instead I spent the whole time in a state of panic, saying ‘brake….brake….BRAKE!!!!’ In my head I knew that this wasn’t the way to lead, teach or mentor but I just couldn’t seem to help myself.

Since Thursday, I’ve been thinking about why this experience was so scary for me. I think it came down to a combination of two things. Firstly, I felt a huge loss of control and secondly, I perceived there was a high risk involved.

The minute I moved over into that passenger seat, I lost control and I didn’t like it. I’ve been a lawyer for a long time, and I’ve interviewed my fair share of clients seriously injured in motor vehicle accidents. I’ve seen how it can devastate lives, so to me, getting behind the wheel of a car and driving is a high-risk activity. I was completely out of my comfort zone.

Now, this is not the first time I’ve felt like this. There have been moments in my career when I’ve been reluctant to hand over control. Because being in control feels good, right? It feels powerful. As a leader, you want to keep your hands firmly on the wheel at all times. It can be really tough to hand your keys over to someone else. This is particularly the case when there is a high risk involved, maybe a project with your most important client or a big sales pitch.

I was speaking to a client last week who is one of the owners of a professional services firm. He was discussing with me his role in the firm and his strong personal connection with his clients. He personally attends all the sales meetings with these clients. However, he now faces a dilemma. The business is growing with plans to expand interstate and it’s not going to be possible for him to do all of this work himself. It’s time for him to give up some control over this process and provide an opportunity for someone in the firm to step up.

In leadership (just like in parenthood), sometimes you have to step aside and give up control. Terrifying? Yes but absolutely necessary if you want to grow the skills and experience of your people. So, how can you do this successfully? How can you sit in the passenger seat without being in a constant state of panic?

• Firstly, it’s important that you have confidence in the person you’re handing over control to. There must be a certain level of trust in their capability. This is why it’s so important to start developing your people’s leadership skills from the very start of their career. There is no point in waiting until someone is appointed in a formal leadership position and then starting their training and mentoring.

• Secondly, you can employ the “dual control” technique. This is just like being in a driving instructor’s car where the instructor has a brake and accelerator on their side as well. What is your leadership succession plan? Who are the up and coming leaders in your organisation? Start handing over the keys to them now to drive around the block with you by their side. You’ve got the brake right there if you need it. Take them to that big client meeting, let them present to the board, allow them to facilitate a segment at the next strategy day.

Your role as a leader is to give people a sense of responsibility and you can’t do this if you are the one always driving.

How is anyone else going to learn and grow? And how are you going to be able to move onto another position, when there is no one who can do what you do in the organisation? It’s time to lead by giving up control.

(And please wish me luck with my son Tommy in the driver’s seat!)

Midja x

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Thank God it’s Monday!

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Did you wake up this morning and think thank god it’s Monday? Did you feel joy?

Or did you experience the ‘Monday Blues’? That feeling of dread, tiredness and unpleasantness that so many people have come to regularly encounter on a Monday morning when they think about starting the working week ahead. If you’re one of these people, you’re probably looking forward to Wednesday. Hump day and the downward slide to Friday afternoon, the time when your real life begins. The problem with this is that on a Sunday afternoon, those familiar feelings of despair, anxiety and dread start to creep up on you and ruin your last few hours of weekend ‘freedom’.
I’m on a mission to bring joy to Monday mornings. A lofty ambition? Yes, but one that I’m passionate about pursuing.

My interest may have been ‘sparked’ by watching and reading the work of Marie Kondo, the famous Japanese organising consultant and author. If you haven’t been on Netflix and watched her series, I encourage you to take a look. If you saw my underwear drawer at the moment and the way its organised, you would be amazed. So much joy!

This got me thinking about joy and the work we do in corporate Australia. For me, there were many years in my career, when I was so thankful for Monday morning. I remember many a time on a Sunday afternoon when I’d be sitting by the pool, a wide smile on my face, as I thought about the week ahead. So excited for the next day. My kids would often make a comment about how much I loved my work and I did.

When my alarm went off at 4:45am on a Monday morning and I’d quickly shower and get ready to leave for work, often facing a 2-hour drive to our law firm’s training centre, I would be so happy and full of anticipation. Looking back on it, I was experiencing joy.

So, what is joy and why is it important?

Joy
noun
1.A feeling of great pleasure and happiness.
Synonyms: delight, great pleasure, joyfulness, jubilation, triumph, exultation, rejoicing, happiness, gladness, glee, exhilaration, ebullience, exuberance, elation, euphoria, bliss, ecstasy, transports of delight, rapture, radiance.

How wonderful does that sound? What if we could experience this, instead of the Monday Blues?

At present, we are facing high levels of stress in our workplaces. The main stress hormones – adrenalin and cortisol, are literally ‘eating’ our brain cells, narrowing our focus and reducing our performance.

We are also experiencing low engagement. Research by Gallop finds that only 14% of workers are engaged in their job, showing up every day with enthusiasm and the motivation to be highly productive. Another 15% of employees are actively disengaged – not only unhappy at work but determined to undermine their employees’ colleagues’ positive efforts. The remaining 71% of employees fall into the “not engaged” category, they show up every day, but do just what is absolutely necessary to get through the day and no more. (State of the Global Workplace Report, Gallop, 2017)

In a time, when we are experiencing high levels of stress, anxiety and disengagement, is joy in the workplace the new competitive advantage?

So, how do we get to experience JOY on a Monday morning? I believe you need 3 ingredients:

1.PASSION
2.PRESENCE and
3.PLAY

If you can satisfy all 3, the outcome is Joy which means less stress, greater fulfillment and higher performance. More on these 3 elements in the blog next week! In the meantime, I’d love you to consider the difference joy in your working week would bring to your overall life.

What if you actually looked forward to returning to work on Monday morning after a restful or busy weekend?
What if you were excited about the challenges that lay ahead, what you might learn and the people you would connect with?
What if instead of Thank God It’s Friday, you thought Thank God It’s Monday?

Midja x

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